Monday, June 1, 2009


You only need look around the office to know that the paper towel is a valuable Plankton commodity. Most, if not all, employees have a roll of company supplied paper towel on their desk. Why? Because it’s convenient, absorbent and, most importantly, it’s free.

Some use it to keep their desk clean, some as a way around Plankton’s “we don’t give tissues to the peons” policy, and you’ll notice that the long term employees have drawn faces on their paper towel rolls and call them Wilson.

However, recent health concerns in the workplace have provided another reason to always be near this precious, and now potentially lifesaving, apparatus.

Paper towel, along with a few other readily available office supplies, can be used to create your very own face mask, to help keep diseases at bay. Using only a piece of paper towel, 2 small bulldog clips and a couple of rubber bands, you can protect yourself from at least 84% of airborne germs and 100% of lunchtime companions.

Also, after wearing this makeshift mask, people will know that you take public health seriously, that you have concern for your safety and the safety of your workmates and, most importantly, that they shouldn’t steal your filth-ridden paper towel roll.

1 comment:

  1. Wise, wise words.

    I never thought of using paper towels as a face mask. Clever.

    And when all of Western society goes to hell in a hand basket because of swine flu, you can use the cardboard inner tube for hand to hand combat.

    Will it's uses never end?